There aren’t many monogamous relationships in which the idea of your partner cheating would be considered a good thing.
But one married man has admitted he is longing for just that to happen.
And what’s even more unexpected is that the unnamed gent claims he wouldn’t be particularly upset if his wife came home and confessed to sleeping with someone else – he’d just be happy she came home.
The 39-year-old revealed all in a post on Reddit’s Relationship Advice forum, explaining how he felt like he was holding his wife back in life and he thought she deserved so much more than he was able to give her.
The man claims he has an incredibly low sex drive – and only initiates sex a few times a year.
He goes on to say he’s the only person his wife has ever had sex with and he can tells she’d like to be doing a lot more in the bedroom.
He said: “I don’t initiate (maybe a couple times a year), when she initiates I do my best but more often than not it comes off as lackluster and I’m just checking things off a list: nibble here, lick there, insert penis there. She wants more. She deserves more.
“I’ve been like this since a teenager, I was never driven by a strong need for sex – I don’t crave it and I don’t pursue it with the lust that some have. I love my wife, I find her beautiful and tell her so every day. Physical (outside of sex), verbal, and spiritual affection is not lacking in our relationship. Sexual affection is.
“She struggles to verbalize it, but I know she desires more. I’m the only person she’s ever been with and she found me early in life. I want her to experience everything she wants in life, but when it comes to sex no matter how hard I try I know that I won’t give her that experience.”
He continued: “If she came home one night and told me she had slept with another man I honestly don’t think I’d be upset – she did come home to me after all.
“Part of being in love with someone is making sure that they have every possibility of happiness and fulfillment. When it comes to sex, this an area where I struggle to give her what she needs. Am I wrong to think it’d be alright for her to find this fulfillment with another person?
“I’m in love with my wife and her with me. I want her desires to be fulfilled, even if that can’t be with me – as long as she does so safely and at the end of the day comes home to me I’ll be happy.”
People on Reddit were quick to suggest that he have an open conversation with his wife about the whole thing.
One person replied: “I feel a conversation is needed. You’re assuming a lot here, and you may indeed be right. It could be she’s content enough that she doesn’t see a need to go elsewhere? I’d imagine 15 years in or whatever it’s been, if it was that huge an issue, she’d have raised it?”
Another said: “This sounds like a…. be careful what you wish for situation. Perhaps try a sex therapist first before pulling the nuclear trigger.”
A third added: “I know you think you’re being selfless but wanting her to have this ‘experience’ and actually being ok with strangers banging your wife is a completely different thing.”
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